Endless
by Wintry Leen
Summary: It was a matter of loving herself first. Oneshot. SasuSaku.#6


**Inspired by:** Trading Yesterday's _Love Song Requiem_

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto in any way possible.

**Author's Note:** I haven't written anything for months. Please forgive me. This can be a piece of crap, but I just want to give writing another shot. Oh, how I miss those days when I have ample time to write. Please review and criticize my work and help me get back to my writing rhythm. God,the plot is so random I wanna kill myself for writing it.

_11/14/12 - Let's Tweet,Tweet, Tweet! :) Follow me (a t)seretulip. :)_

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**_Endless_**

Perhaps I was just childish back then. Every time I got a taste of sweetness, I always chalked it up to the feeling I've always recognized yet never really understood. Love.

"Sasuke-kun, I love you."

Looking back, I could say that my attraction to him back then was at the very least similar to the attraction I had had to a strawberry flavoured ice cream I had gobbled prior to seeing him standing alone looking up at the sky with such wintriness that even the penetrating rays of the sun couldn't deter.

And then he looked at me. And I thought that was sweet because despite the swarm of people surrounding us, he chose to lay those empty eyes on me as if he had expected them to be filled with whatever I could offer. Love.

" Do you love me, too?"

_He glared._

I could handle that.

_He turned and walked away._

That was still okay. After all, isn't that how love is supposed to be? Cruel?

**…**

Maybe I was still being childish when I cried in front of him just to stop him from leaving.

" Sasuke-kun, please stay."

I was desperate to not break that faint and dying connection I had with him. I tried so hard to establish that. I tried so hard to believe in the invisible. I tried so hard to pretend it was there. He couldn't just throw it away without even knowing it once existed.

" You're annoying."

_Yes, but I love you. _ I wanted him to know. But he wouldn't take any of that. Those words were lifeless. Even I knew it myself. I couldn't do anything for him. I couldn't make him smile. I couldn't save him. I couldn't even remain as a friend because I was so selfish I wanted something more than that.

" Please, Sasuke-kun. I love you."

_He turned his back on me._

No. Please. I would make my words come to life for him.

" I'll do anything for you. I love you so much."

_He disappeared from my sight._

" Thank you, Sakura."

For what? For letting him hurt me? No problem. Isn't that how love is supposed to be? Unconditional?

**…**

I thought I was mature enough to let go of all of my childhood memories. Including him. But I didn't realize until it was all too late that I was never ready to do so. I was scared to let go because even if letting go didn't mean forgetting altogether, I was afraid to instinctively blur the line once the lingering pain became too much to contain.

So when the news had spread that he came back, I summoned all the strength and courage I could muster and ran to his manor.

I burst through the door and upon seeing him just standing there, perhaps in the middle of reminiscing the past and welcoming the ghosts of his yesterdays, I immediately wrapped my arms around him.

God, I missed him so much I just wanted to stay like that forever. As much as he detested me, I just couldn't stop loving him in return.

" I missed you."

I cried into his shirt hoping he would believe the sincerity my tears were emphasizing.

" Please don't leave me ever again."

I tightened my arms around him. Why? Was it that hard for him to do the same? To console me? He never really cared about me, did he?

It felt like I was in the arms of a statue made of ice. I longed for his warmth, yet he could only offer me his coldness…that was the only thing I could deserve from him.

But I was a beggar. I had no right to complain.

" I still love you, Sasuke-kun."

I raised my head to meet his eyes, but he never changed: he still couldn't look at me.

" Do you love me now?"

Even a beggar like me had a chance to be hopeful, right? Had an opportunity to be loved back by the one I loved the most, right?

Finally, he touched me.

He grabbed both of my shoulders and gently pushed me away. His eyes bore into mine. But they were as void as ever. I choked at that fact. I couldn't change him. He couldn't love me.

" Love yourself first, Sakura."

He dropped his hands and walked away from me again.

I really never got tired of watching such scene unfold, did I? The man of my dreams walking away while I was staring at his back, crying, and hoping he made a wrong decision.

But isn't that how love is supposed to be? Enduring?

**…**

Three years.

I took me that long to finally accept the happiness that was meant for me – the happiness of being free, of loving myself, of being everything I can be.

I was blinded by the imagined happiness I thought could occur in my reality. I was blinded by my own fantasies. But I never regretted being put through all those sorrows and feeling the pain that almost murdered me. I learned so much from those experiences.

I learned so much from him. That was why I came back to thank him.

I saw him in the training grounds looking up at the sky. Unexpectedly, he shifted his eyes to me. _Just like the first time I saw him._

" Sasuke, thank you."

I smiled. I started approaching him.

" I am now a successful doctor, and I'm very much happy and contented with my life. It's all thanks to you. You taught me how."

He still had his eyes on me, but I felt his gaze soften.

" Sasuke,I – "

" Sakura."

" I'm loving myself."

We both smiled.

That was the perfect ending I was worthy of. I started walking away leaving him behind – an inaccuracy in the formula I used to equate my life in.

" Sakura. Tell me when you're ready to love again. "

I turned, and for the first time, I chuckled.

" Silly, it will always be you."

Because love is supposed to be endless.

**...**

_**Fin.**_


End file.
